Side Effects

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1.Apr.2004

My husband and I were watching television the other night in bed, when a commercial came on touting the benefits of a good nights sleep by taking a certain prescription medication. We’re all for getting a good nights rest, because with four children, one dog and a nocturnal feline, we rarely receive one. So we enviously watched the actors sleeping and then waking up looking refreshed.

Then, as the law requires, a voice over mentioned a few side effects associated with the ingestion of this sleeping pill. One of them was diarrhea.

I’m not saying that a good nights rest isn’t important to me, because it is. I’m just not sure mixing a sleeping pill and diarrhea is a good thing. Unless the prescription is accompanied by a big ole’ bag of adult diapers, I’m going to skip it.

I don’t think I’d wake up nearly as refreshed as those actors portrayed.

A friend of mine went through a couple of antidepressants to find one that worked for her. The first one she took certainly helped her depression along. She was more depressed than ever when her hair started falling out by the handfuls. At that point she weighed the options; depressed, but with hair, or bald and happy. She chose to embrace her depression and grow her hair back. I don’t mean to infer that people who are follicley challenged can’t be little rays of sunshine, but she was sort of attached to the hair on her head.

The second medication she tried turned her into a 24-hour perspiration machine. She could be sitting naked in sub zero temperatures and there would be sweat rolling down her face. It wasn’t pretty. So…depressed and sweaty…or simply depressed; depression and dry skin won out.

I will say one thing for the roller coaster ride of antidepressant choosing; it did take her mind off what was bothering her before she began. Depression gave way to anger issues. She was mad as heck at the side effects. Hey, she’s cured!

If you listen carefully to commercials about any kind of medication, from cholesterol lowering, to acid-reflux relieving, the cure sounds like it could kill you. You’re told to notify your doctor immediately if you develop fever or chills, a sore throat, unusual bleeding (define ‘unusual’) or bruising, mouth sores, abdominal pain, pale stools, or darkened urine. If you experience an uncommon allergic reaction (difficulty breathing; closing of the throat; swelling of the lips, tongue, or face; or hives), These symptoms could be early signs of dangerous side effects. I’m afraid to ask what the late signs would be.

Several years ago I went to see a gastroenterologist because I was having abdominal pain. He prescribed a pill that was for abdominal pain. What he failed to mention was that the pill caused abdominal pain. Sure enough, soon after taking my medication I’d be doubled over in agony---until I figured it out and dumped the remainder of the bottle down the toilet. My abdominal pain was gone, but I still had anger issues.

I just saw on CNN that a man in Malaysia taking some sort of medication, cut off his own, uh…well, private parts, fried it and then ate it. I wonder how the warning label on his medication read? “If you suddenly feel the urge to use a knife on a personal part of your anatomy without benefit of professional medical help, or anesthesia, please get yourself to the nearest medical facility as soon as possible. Oh, and don’t even think about using a deep fat fryer while on this medication” Can you imagine the anger issues he’s having right now?

As I was writing this column, my husband hollered that ‘my’ commercial was on television again; the one warning you about the possibility of messing your pants while sleeping.

While watching it again, we heard the voice over warning about another side effect to taking this sleeping pill that we’d missed earlier; drowsiness.

Drowsiness? A side effect of taking a sleeping pill? Well if that doesn’t make you mad. Imagine, taking a sleeping pill and getting drowsy. What will they think of next?

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Way too funny, Pam! Boy do I know about side effects... There are some medications where I get so many of the side effects at the same time that it isn't worth the bonus of the med... And then there's my friend who has totally different sied effects than those mentioned... :-) Keep up the funny columns!
Jeri Lynn
Shoreline, WA USA -

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